Day 298: What January’s Good For

I don’t believe in making New Year’s resolutions, because I don’t think that January 1st is a good day to start new habits. Like most people I am naturally drawn to beginnings of time frames for making changes in my life. The beginnings of years, months, and weeks all feel like good starting dates. In practice, they are the exact opposite. They are the worst times for new starts.

One problem with those special dates is that they’re always future dates. Setting a future start date is just a form of procrastination. It is a way of postponing the new thing, of putting it off until that golden someday when it will finally feel good to get started. But it rarely feels good to get started even on those special days, which is why it’s pointless to wait. And the longer I put the change off, the more likely I am to keep putting it off. Whatever is holding me back–fear, laziness, anticipation of discomfort–best to face it now, head-on.

Another problem is that starting on a special date tends to put me in an all-or-nothing mindset. If the goal is to change from that date on, then to fail on any one day afterward is to fail forever, or at least until the next special starting date. Once I’ve had the inevitable first lapse, I start to think, “I’ve already failed. Why continue to try?” But a lapse does not mean failure. It just means I have to try harder on the next day.

So, I know that if I want to make changes in my life, the day to start is today. If that day happens to be January 1, so be it, but I would never deliberately pick that day, because the symbolism might put me into the dangerous all-or-nothing mindset. Also, I know to expect some lapses and to aim for overall improvement rather than perfect performance. This much I have finally learned in life. My 40-odd Januarys have been good for something, at least.

But January is not just the beginning of the new year. It also marks the end of the old year. And while it may not be a good time for resolutions, it is a convenient place to chop off a year-sized piece of the past and take a close look at it. So I will not write a post about New Year’s resolutions, but I will probably write a few more posts about 2020 and its lessons. The old year may be done with me, but I am not finished with it quite yet.

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