A Thought for My Pennies

Yesterday I took some change out of my pocket and put it on my desk. Later, when I went to pick it up again, I noticed that one of the pennies was smaller than the others. That couldn’t be right. So I took a closer look and found that it was actually a Bahamian coin.

Isn’t this sand dollar design pretty?

When I get foreign coins as change, I always keep them. Partly it’s because they’re not legal tender in the United States, and I’m kind of a stickler for rules, but mostly it’s because I think they’re interesting. I also think it’s interesting how often I get foreign coins as change. I can’t help but wonder how many Americans passed this coin along before it came to me. You can’t tell from my pictures, but this coin is super shiny. It’s a real eye-grabber. You’d think people would notice that it wasn’t a penny and keep it. But maybe I’m the only one who finds foreign currency so fascinating?

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Never Apart

A little doppelganger of my husband sits on my shoulder while I’m clothes shopping. I pick up a shirt in a pretty shade of blue-green. “No teal!” the little husband hollers in my ear. I move along. Next I find something in gray. “Too drab,” he objects. “You should wear brighter colors.” I move along. Soon I spot a comfy-looking sweater. The little husband gets apoplectic over that one. “That’s something your mother would wear!” Is that such a bad thing? “It is!” So the little husband steers me toward a more form-fitting sweater, but he nearly flips on me when I reach for the blue-green. “I said no teal! Try the brown.” I hesitate, because he did just tell me to wear brighter colors. “It’s OK. It goes with your hair.” He’s right. It does.

He’s devil-hard to please, that little husband on my shoulder, but he’s not so bad. He has good taste. And he doesn’t say a word when I stop in the jewelry section and pick out a jeweled butterfly pin that I’ll probably never wear. He knows how much I like sparkly things. He also doesn’t complain about being dragged from store to store. He’s actually a pretty good shopping companion, all things considered.

I make my purchases and bring them home. I tell my real husband about how his doppelganger was with me the whole time. I think maybe he’ll say that it’s crazy. Instead, he says, “I know exactly what you mean. There’s a little doppelganger of you that goes everywhere with me!”

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Showcase of Learning

Dear Livia,

Yesterday was your kindergarten class’s Showcase of Learning and Habitats. It was one of the most eagerly anticipated events of the school year. We had already been looking forward to it for weeks, and then it got postponed several times due to snow. Oh, the agony of waiting! But finally the weather cooperated, and your father and I were both able to attend.

On display were various animal artifacts, including owl pellets, a bag o’ blubber, and animal bones. Then there were the things that you and your classmates had created, including stories, paintings, wolves made of dryer lint, and salmon ladders made out of blocks.  There was also a large woodland habitat constructed out of cardboard and paper.

Stuffed animals were welcome, and some of them were perched in the habitat. Mousy Wousy, Owly, and Chippy were there. Chippy was very popular. All the kids knew him and liked him, and played with him. His grubbiness is a testament to his popularity as an animal companion.

You had told us that your class would be singing a song, so we waited and waited. It was getting late and people were starting to leave, so we asked the teacher if you were going to sing. She said, “Oh. That’s the second request. Yeah, we can sing!” So she gathered you all together and as a group you sang “The Fox Went out on a Chilly Night” while she accompanied you on the autoharp.

If I hadn’t already thought your teacher was old-fashioned, the autoharp would have done it. I probably hadn’t seen an autoharp since I was in grade school during the ’70s. It was beautifully nostalgic.

Your teacher is old-fashioned in other ways, too, all good. The modern obsession with academics bothers me, and I’m convinced that Marshall hated kindergarten because there wasn’t enough play. Your teacher focuses on play, and nature activities, and singing. She’s always introducing you to new things, including power tools! You like her, of course, but you have no idea how lucky you are to have her as your teacher. I am happy for you.

We had so much fun at your Showcase of Learning. Thank you for putting on such a good show!

Love,

Mom

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Making Faces

My husband says that I make “John Mayer faces” when I play the piano. Who should be more insulted by this: me or John Mayer?

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The Boiling Frog

I recently read an NPR article about emerging diseases. I’ve shared the link, but I suggest that you not read it unless you’re in the mood for something scary and/or depressing. The thing that interested me particularly, though, and which provided a welcome distraction from the scary/depressing part, was a comment that one of the scientists in the article made. He said something about “boiling the frog.” It seemed such an odd choice of words to me, and it stuck with me.

The next day I mentioned it to my husband, who thought the phrase sounded sort of familiar. He looked it up, and then shared what he found with me. According to Wikipedia, the idea of the Boiling Frog is that if you throw a frog into boiling water it will jump out, but if you slowly raise the temperature you can boil it to death before it realizes the danger. It’s not a happy thought or even true, but it does make a pretty good metaphor!

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Worth Every Penny

Every January I get a memo from my employer telling me that the cost of my long-term disability insurance has gone up. I hate this memo. I don’t want to be reminded of how much I’m already paying, let alone be told that I have to pay more. The insurance was very cheap when I first started on it. Buying it seemed like a no-brainer then. Twenty years later, it’s not cheap anymore. So every January I think that maybe I should drop the insurance.

I haven’t dropped it, though, and I probably never will. I know how this world works. Having kept the insurance for so long, to drop it now would almost certainly bring catastrophe my way. I’d become disabled faster than I could say “Murphy’s Law.” So I figure this insurance is the only thing standing between me and disability. When I look at the cost from this point of view, it’s worth every penny!

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Sleep

I have been deliberately getting more sleep every night. It seems to be paying off. I feel a little less anxious and irritated. Not a ton, thanks to the Internet and its constant reminders of our impending doom. Just a little. But I’ll take what I can get these days, and it will have to be enough.

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A Birthday Celebration

Dear Children,

Livia had a birthday this month. She is now six years old! It’s hard to believe, because I can still remember her as a baby. Baby Livia would tackle every obstacle head-on, wearing a big smile, and with a gleam in her eye. In many ways she’s still like that, only she’s bigger now and doesn’t drool so much.

Livia’s birthday provided us with a good reason to use the Friendly’s gift card that we had received for Christmas. You had been to restaurants before, but you had never been to one that catered to children. Here they gave you crowns to wear, and your own special menu that had only things that kids like, such as hot dogs and hamburgers. And every meal came with an ice cream. The staff sang a birthday song to Livia when they brought out her ice-cream sundae. You both loved the place, and Marshall wants to go there for his birthday.

You especially enjoyed your ice cream. Livia finished her sundae, then kept scraping her cup with her spoon, trying to get every last bit of ice cream. That girl really likes her sweets! Marshall got a build-your-own sundae, which came with little cups of fudge sauce, M&M’s, and gummy bears on the side. He poured on the “tar” and then carefully stuck the candies into it. But he saved a few candies for us, because he’s nice like that.

Afterward we went to the store to buy Livia some Pokemon cards, because that’s what she wanted more than anything else. Marshall also got a set of cards, but he had to pay for part of it, because it wasn’t his birthday. He felt his money was well spent, though, because he got an awesome card, which he brought to school the next day for show-and-tell. We worried all day that he might lose the card at school (or that someone might take it from him), but he came home with a big smile on his face. The other kids had been impressed. It was great to see him so excited.

Livia is thrilled with her cards, too. I think she likes them as much for cuteness as for their battle strengths. That might give Marshall the advantage when they play against each other. But, since Livia often wins at other games, perhaps it’s for the best. Everybody deserves to be a winner, and everyone should know what it feels like to lose from time to time. Win or lose, I hope you will both continue to enjoy your cards for years to come.

I don’t know if dinner at Friendly’s followed by a trip to the toy store will become a new birthday tradition, but it sure was fun this time.

Love,

Mom

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Can You Gibe Jive While Gybing in Gyves? Does that Jibe?

There are many groups of words that have similar spellings and/or pronunciations, and some of them can be tricky, but this one is the absolute worst!

gibe:

  • n. insulting remark or taunt
  • v. to deride
  • v. to jeer at

gybe:

  • v. shift from one side of a ship to the other
  • v. to change course using a fore-and-at sail

jibe:

  • variant spelling of “gibe”
  • variant spelling of “gybe.”
  • v. to be in accord or match

gyve:

  • v. (archaic) to fetter or shackle
  • n. shackle (usually used in plural)

jive:

  • n. style of jazz
  • n. slang talk of jazz musicians
  • n. a deceptive or worthless thing
  • v. to dance to jive music
  • v. to chitchat
  • v. to speak to someone in a misleading or teasing way
  • adj. misleading or meaningless
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Bah Humbug, Microsoft!

I bought a new computer a while back. It came with Windows 10, so that’s what I’ve been using for the last year or more. Windows 10 is very tablet-oriented, which I guess makes sense, since the computer has a touch screen and can be used tablet-style. And because of that, programs are no longer “programs.” They’re “apps.”

I don’t use most of the apps. I’m a simple person. I do simple things. I use a word processor, a spreadsheet occasionally, a web browser, and a photo editor. That’s pretty much all I need or care about.

For photo editing, I was perfectly happy using the app that came with the computer. It was actually pretty darned good. With it you could adjust light, shadows, saturation, color (even the color of particular objects), and all sorts of other things. It was a powerful little app.

And then one day Microsoft updated the operating system, and as part of that update they removed most of the photo editor’s functionality. Now it’s all about the filters. Whoopee. I totally get that filters are hot right now, but Microsoft could have simply added to the existing filter collection without removing everything that was good about the app.

The timing could not have been worse. They did it right before I had to finish my photo album for the year, and I couldn’t edit my photos the way I wanted to. I was so indignant that I attempted to complain by phone, by e-mail, by any means possible, only to find that their customer service is designed to completely stymie all efforts to lodge a complaint. Basically, if you’re unhappy then they don’t want to know about it. That’s not OK.

Microsoft, you almost spoiled my Christmas with your meddling. Leave my apps alone unless you intend to improve them. And until you get some decent customer service, bah humbug to you!

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