Five Years

Dear Kids,

I recently wrote about Christmas 2016. I also reposted about Christmas 2011. This got me to thinking about how much you’ve changed over the past five years.

Marshall didn’t talk much when he was a toddler. He used mostly single words and short phrases. We had thought that preschool would get him talking more, but it didn’t. He would come home from school, and I’d ask him about his day, but he almost never had anything to say.

He’s still not the chattiest boy, unless you get him on a topic he’s really interested in, such as “Sky Kids,” gadgets from “Odd Squad,” TNT, or Pokemon. Then he’ll talk and talk. For example, he had a special pass that gave him permission to bring something to school for show-and-tell. He kept that pass for months with no interest in using it. Then one day he got a rare Pokemon card, and suddenly he insisted on using the pass the very next day. He couldn’t wait to tell everyone about his new treasure.

But though he is relatively quiet, he has already demonstrated a love of wordplay and a desire to tell stories. He even wrote a story one night when he was supposed to be sleeping. I found the pages on his bed in the morning. The story went like this:

“One day Marshall and his friends were playing on a playground. Then pine cones were falling and they grew fast. The worst part is someone was jumping on a trampoline to get a drink from the clouds. It was so bad. Then 100 blobs fell from the sky. Then 100 purple blobs fell from then sky. Then 100 pink blobs fell from the sky. Marshall caught all of them. Then a helicopter dropped TNT and bombs on the playground. Then the playground blew up and no one was hurt. The End.”

Livia in 2011 was less than a year old. At Christmas she was running around grabbing snowflake ornaments in her “moist little hands.” Now in 2016, her hands are bigger and not so moist anymore. They are, however, almost always covered with marker, glitter, and/or glue. She loves making art. She colors every day. We had a family art contest earlier this year, and she liked it so much that she has organized another one for January. There will be five prizes: one each for the snowmanniest, the snowiest, the sleddiest, the iglooiest, and the treeiest pieces of art. That should be fun!

But as I sit here thinking about how Livia has changed, the thing that strikes me is how she hasn’t changed in one regard. She’s eager and has always been that way. She came into this world in a hurry, and she doesn’t like to wait. She wants everything now, now, now. For example, she was only allowed one piece of Halloween candy per day, but after a couple of weeks we found a large, hidden stash of candy wrappers from the extra candy she’d been sneaking on the side. Her dad is always telling her to slow down and savor things, but that’s not her style. She wants to ball them up in her glittery, gluey, marker-streaked hands and gleefully run away with them. And there’s a lot to be said for that approach to life. Carpe diem!

And that, my dears, is how you have changed (or not) over the past five years. They were wonderful years, and I love looking back on them. But I also love looking toward the future, and I can’t wait to see how you grow during the next five years and beyond.

Love,

Mom

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Catching a Fox

We saw a fox in the yard the other day. We ran outside with our cameras hoping to get a picture. The fox was moving fast, though, so I didn’t stop to put on shoes. I didn’t think I’d be outside for long, but I ended up following him all the way down the driveway. He was gone by the time I reached the end. What a bummer. And my feet were getting numb, so I high-tailed it up the driveway. When my husband came back in later, he said, “I caught the fox on video.” I didn’t know how he’d managed it, but I couldn’t wait to see it. Then he showed it to me. It was a video of me running up the driveway. 😉

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State of Mind

I have been so distracted lately. I can’t seem to stay focused long enough to finish anythi

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Livia in 2016

Dear Livia,

Here are a few stories about you from 2016.

Fifth Disease: earlier this year you came home sick with something that the school nurse believed was Fifth disease. Neither your dad nor I had ever heard of it, so we looked it up on the Internet. Apparently it’s common, and a lot of people have had it, often without knowing that they’ve had it. I’m pretty sure that the diagnosis was correct (the facial rash is very distinctive). Anyway, you loved having Fifth disease. You told anyone who would listen that you had it, even after your symptoms were long gone. You took your condition so seriously that one night, dissatisfied with the available selection of nightclothes, you demanded “pajamas appropriate for Fifth disease.”

Picky, Picky: in kindergarten you started getting school lunches, and you did not like most of the meals. Hot dogs and chicken nuggets were fine. Everything else was not. But we encouraged you to try other things from the menu. We thought that the constant exposure to other foods would be good for you and that eventually you’d learn to like more of them.

A few weeks into the school year I got an e-mail from your teacher. She said that the kitchen staff had been doing their best to accommodate your wishes, but since you had no known food allergies, and since they had hundreds of lunches to serve, could we please explain to you that you could not get items customized? I laughed and laughed when I read that. It was so like you to get everyone around you invested in your happiness!

But, while the e-mail was funny, I was disappointed that you’d managed to wrap the lunch ladies around your little finger. They should know better. So I asked your teacher to tell them NOT to cater to you. And I asked you not to pester them, but rather to get SunButter and jelly sandwiches on the days when nothing else appealed. Everyone seemed satisfied with these instructions, and I thought I had solved the problem.

Uh-uh. We recently found out that the lunch ladies have been serving you jelly-only sandwiches. Apparently you had a “big talk” with them. You told them that you didn’t like SunButter, and they caved to your demands. So I think it’s safe to say now that school lunches are not going to help you get over your pickiness. On the bright side, we have made some progress at home. You will eat your salad if it means getting dessert. You’ve also started to like steak.

Singing to Mommy: one night you came over to me, sat in my lap, and sang me an impromptu song about how much you loved me. You started with skin and blood. Blood, blood, blood. Then you sang that you loved me “past my bones” and into my brain, and that you loved my heart. It was one of those rare moments during which I wished I had a video camera trained on us. You had the most adorable smile with the tiniest, most beautiful teeth, and you were being so sweet and innocent and inadvertently gory. It was a perfect moment.

Everyone’s Annoying: one day you hit your brother, and you said you’d done it because he was annoying you. I explained that you can’t hit people just because they’re annoying. I said, “Even Mommy is annoying sometimes, right?” I don’t know what response I was expecting. Maybe a nod? But you looked straight at me and a great weight seemed to slide off your shoulders as you confessed, “Yes. Yes you are. You really are annoying.” I couldn’t help but laugh. You didn’t understand why I was laughing, so you exclaimed, “No. I’m being serious. You really are!” I knew, and that’s why it was funny. Mothers are supposed to be annoying. We had a discussion later, though, to let you know that though you can tell Mommy absolutely anything (because Mommy loves you so much), you shouldn’t tell other people that they’re annoying, even when they really, really are.

Love,

Mom

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We Won!

I had thought we were nearly done with our IRS ordeal back in March, but I was wrong. Everything got stalled again. Our next step was to get a tax advocate.

It took months for the tax advocate to gather all the relevant information and make her recommendations. Then it took time for the IRS to figure out exactly how much they owed us.

But in the end we did finally get our money back. They sent us a big fat check, and when our tax advocate gave us the green light, we cashed it. And after we cashed it, they discovered that they actually owed us more, so they sent us another check. We got all of our money back plus interest, and we ended our year with some money in the bank.

I had always heard that IRS audits were to be avoided at all costs. I now know how very true that is. Even if you’re right (and it’s hard to be right given the complexities of the tax code), proving it can be difficult. There are all sorts of hoops to jump through, and you must jump through them exactly the way they want you to.

So yeah, don’t get audited! But if you do, know that you can fight them. It’s not easy, and it’s not fun, but it is possible to win!

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Ugh. Clowns.

It’s Christmas Eve and I ought to have upbeat Christmas songs stuck in my head, but what do I have instead?

“Send in the Clowns”

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Computers, the Past, and the Future

Dear Kids,

I think I spend too much time on the computer. I think you think that, too. You will probably have memories of me ignoring you in favor of my computer, just as I have memories of my mother ignoring me in favor of her books. That makes me sad.

On the other hand, I feel like I haven’t captured enough stories about you on my blog. Just recently I came across an old post from Christmas 2011. It brings back such wonderful memories. I wish I had a Christmas post for every year. I don’t, though, and never will, because I didn’t find the time to write the stories down. That makes me sad, too.

So, for 2017 I will try to use the computer more wisely by spending less time on Facebook and more time on writing.

In the meantime let’s look at that Christmas 2011 post. It never made it into a photo album. I will put it into the 2016 album so that we can see how much you’ve changed over the past five years.

CHRISTMAS 2011

Christmas 2011 was Livia’s first Christmas and Marshall’s third.

We talked to Marshall about Santa Claus many times in the weeks approaching Christmas, and he learned to recognize the fat man in the red, fur-lined coat, but he still didn’t quite get the whole idea of what Christmas and Santa mean. He grasped the idea of gifts, though. As we were coming down the stairs Christmas Eve, he saw one of the presents his dad was taking out to the car and he said, “Present! Downstairs!” He was very excited.

Having mastered the art of opening gifts at his last birthday party, he eagerly tore into the pile of Christmas gifts at his vovó’s house. He got so good at it that he started opening everyone else’s gifts, too, like Vovó’s nightgowns. He was quite glad to unwrap Livia’s gifts, as well. I noticed, though, that as soon as he saw that a gift contained clothing, he would toss the clothes into the air and move on to the next thing.

Marshall ate all the butterfly-shaped crackers on the cheese-and-cracker plate. Then he asked for another butterfly, and everyone said, “Oh, he said ‘butterfly!’ How cute!” His dad told me about this later and he seemed disgusted. He said, “It wasn’t cute. He was just trying to get another cracker out of them!” It was cute, I think, but yeah, he was totally working an angle.

Marshall got a set of toy Black & Decker tools. They are impressively realistic and sturdy. Both kids were totally engrossed by them and we had silence in the house for at least half an hour Christmas morning. That makes those plastic toys worth their weight in gold!

Livia couldn’t resist the snowflake ornaments on the tree. By the time we were done opening presents on Christmas day, she had removed all of the ones that she could reach. She’d grab a snowflake, ball it up in one of her moist little hands, then run around until someone took it away from her.

I’m so glad that we have these stories from 2011. I hope we’ll have lots of great stories from 2017, too!

Love,

Mom

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Here Comes Christmas

Dear Kids,

Christmas always sneaks up on me. No matter how much Christmas prep I think I’ve done before and right after Thanksgiving, it’s never enough. Come December, every day brings new tasks that must be done or else the whole holiday will be jeopardized. Or so it feels, anyway. And the time passes faster and faster the closer we get to December 25, as if the holiday is so massive that it pulls everything toward it, like a black hole.

With time flying by like that, the only thing I can do is hang on for the ride and focus on the priorities. I’m a slow mover and often grumpy and tired. I know I’m not going to get everything done, so I try to stay focused on the most critical things, like the Christmas tree. The decorated tree is what officially signals that Christmas is coming, and it’s only after the tree goes up that our elf, Charley, arrives. This is one Christmas task that we must always do, and the earlier the better.

This year your Daddy brought home a beautiful tree, and then you and I decorated it. You were both so eager to hang the ornaments that you weren’t as careful as I kept urging you to be, and a glass butterfly ornament got broken. I yelled, but only because you were both barefoot, and I didn’t want you near the broken glass. It was OK, though. Sometimes things break, and then we have to let them go. But you know what’s great? We always get a few new ornaments each year, so will never run out. We’re also collecting happy memories along the way, and that’s even more important.

We added something extra to the run-up to Christmas this year: an Advent calendar. Your Grammie had wanted to buy you one, and I said I liked the ones with the little drawers. Little did I know how much extra trouble I’d be creating for myself! The calendar is shaped like a gingerbread house, and it’s adorable, but the drawers are tiny. I went to the store and bought some very small presents (stickers, balloons, etc.) to go in it, but even those turned out to be too big. So I needed another solution, and I found two. It occurred to me that paper notes could be folded to fit in there. So, for some days I created treasure hunt clues to lead you to your presents. On other days I gave you “Magic Christmas Tickets” that were good for an extra treat, an extra book at bedtime, or a half hour of coding time on Mommy’s computer. The biggest hit was the extra treat ticket, but you really liked the treasure hunts, too.  I think I’ll be able to do a much better job of it next year. Your father wants to get in on the action, too, so expect to see some Magic Christmas Tickets that entitle you to spend extra time with Daddy!

Your father and I also got an extra pre-Christmas treat this year, because Marshall’s school put on a musical Christmas show. Marshall and his classmates sang some great holiday songs. We enjoyed the show, and we were so proud of him. We waited outside the gym afterward so we could each give him a big hug before he went back to class.

Your father says that I shouldn’t compare Christmas to a black hole, because it sounds too negative. I suppose he has a point. The thing is, Christmas can be tough sometimes. Many people get stressed and/or depressed around the holiday. But however hard the gravity of Christmas may pull you down, always remember that the bottom of the “black hole” is filled with presents, twinkly lights, cookies, carols, and good cheer. That will always be true as long as you let Christmas live in your heart. I hope you always will.

Love,

Mom

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Oopsie

OK, so I didn’t get quite as much done as I had hoped. But I watched two Christmas movies, and I remembered the gift for the kids’ Advent calendar.

Oh, and I ate kale. On purpose!

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To Do Today

My goals for today are simple.

  1. Sleep in (mission accomplished!)
  2. Solve the Saturday crossword puzzle (mission accomplished! It took about an hour, as did Friday’s puzzle.)
  3. Solve the Sunday crossword puzzle (done!)
  4. Shop for additional decoration needs, such as gold string for the ornaments that have lost their hangers, and a wreath hook with which to hang the pretty wreath that I bought on sale after Christmas last year.
  5. Hang lights along the stairs
  6. Decorate the dining room
  7. Make a list of presents to buy
  8. Make a list of people to send Christmas cards to
  9. Make board for hanging Christmas cards on (done, with Livia’s very enthusiastic help!)
  10. Cleaning
  11. Laundry (done!)
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