Bouncy Ball

Marshall’s auntie bought him a shiny, new, bouncy ball. We all like it. Why? Because…

“We are all children at heart,” said Poirot thoughtfully. “Les Feux d’Artifices, the Party, the games with balls—yes, and even the conjuror, the man who deceives the eye, however carefully it watches…”

from Peril at End House

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Power Savers

All of us should try to limit our energy usage. Here are some of the things that my husband and I have done to save energy.

  • We added insulation to the attic. We can no longer use the space for storage, but the insulation helps keep the house toasty warm, not to mention that we don’t get ice dams anymore.
  • We replaced all of our windows and external doors. It cost us a bundle, but I shudder to think what our heating bills would be like if we hadn’t done it.
  • We replaced our shower head. The new, efficient shower head works great. It was a totally painless way to conserve energy.
  • We keep our thermostat set to the low 60s during the winter. It seemed cold at first, but I’ve gotten used to warming myself by wearing sweaters and fleecies. Now, when I go shopping during the winter, I almost can’t stand being in the store because it’s so dry and hot!
  • We try to remember to turn off any lights we’re not using. It’s such a habit for us that our son, barely two years old, has already learned it. He knows to turn the light off when he leaves a room!
  • We try to open windows and run fans instead of running the AC.
  • We often use the energy saving feature on our AC, even though it’s extremely noisy.
  • We use the coolest water temperature appropriate for each load of laundry.
  • We’re trying to eat less meat and to buy more locally grown foods. We even joined a CSA last year!
  • I buy all my music by digital download. My husband has warned me that I may regret this someday, since the quality of the MP3 files that they sell is not as good as the files we would create by ripping the CDs ourselves. Oh, well. I just don’t want to be responsible for more plastic being created unnecessarily.
  • We try to buy minimally processed foods. It often seems that the more processed a food is, the more packaging that comes with it. More packaging means more energy usage and more waste.

It almost sounds impressive, like we’re being really “green,” but we didn’t do any of it to save the environment per se. We did it to save money or, in some cases, to improve our diet (being healthy saves money, too!). It was totally selfishly motivated, and yet so good for everyone.

There are still more ways in which we can selfishly save energy. My personal goals include

  • Taking shorter showers
  • Using fewer paper towels
  • Eventually, building raised beds and growing some veggies
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Rant Against Riders

As I mentioned before, there are people who ride ATVs and dirt bikes in the woods behind my house. I hate that. At the risk of sounding prudish, old-fashioned, sissy, or like a tree-hugger, I am strongly against riding fuel-burning vehicles in the woods for several reasons.

What is the purpose of having woods? I mean, why do we leave the land wooded instead of chopping it all down and developing it in some way? Different people might have slightly different answers, but I believe all of those answers boil down to the same basic idea: we realize on some level that we must have areas where Nature can live on her own terms. A balance is created by and between the flora and fauna. This balance is critical to life on this planet as we know it, if for no other reason than plants are our air scrubbers. Without them, there will be too much carbon dioxide and too little oxygen for us to survive.

There is also a psychological, emotional, and spiritual value to the woods. Most people, I think, feel better when they spend time in a natural setting, such as in the woods, or at a park, or near a lake. In my experience, walking in the woods is a great way to relax, get some exercise, and breathe some fresh air.

We need wooded areas. This we know. But just “having” them isn’t enough. We need to preserve them. Mostly, though, we end up harming them. In some places, we prevent all forest fires. Without the natural cleaning that occasional, small fires provide, the forest floor becomes a tinderbox and just the merest spark can ignite an unstoppable inferno. In other places, like the rain forest, we cut down too many trees, which creates a number of problems, including erosion of the land and extinction of certain animals. We have also introduced certain plants and animals into places where they have no natural enemies, allowing them to overwhelm the native flora and fauna. Here we dread our first sighting of the Asian longhorned beetle, because we know it is probably just a matter of time.

Those are just a few of the big ways that we damage our forests. There are also smaller ways. For example, we cut trails. I’m no expert, but it seems to me that trails ruin the natural drainage of the forest. Water follows the path of least resistance, so it rushes down trails much harder and faster than it does elsewhere. The longer this goes on, the more the trail degrades. Eventually, the people who use the woods will create new trails because the old ones are rutted and full of loose rock. Ultimately, that doesn’t help. In places where there is forest management, rangers will set up and maintain berms and drainage areas. There is no one to do that in our woods, and the ATV riders are constantly making new trails.

So I get really mad at the people who ride their motorized vehicles in the woods. First, they make noise which spoils the quiet, natural aura of the woods. Second, they make pollution which spoils the fresh air. And last but not least, they’re always making new trails, sometimes just feet away from the old ones. This kills plants and causes erosion.

Get out of the woods, riders!

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Two Words

Dear Computer Virus Creator,

YOU SUCK!

Sincerely,

Your Victim

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Gardens

It’s that time of year when I wish very much that I had a garden. Not that I have time for gardening, but it would be pleasant on a summer’s day to sit outside, sipping a cool beverage, admiring the blooms.

Poirot once said,

The people who come to hotels are like a flock of sheep. It is customary to sit on the terrace overlooking the bay—eh bien, so everyone sits on the terrace. Only I who am an original sit overlooking the garden.

from Peril at End House

Now, after reading that quote, one might think that Poirot loved gardens, too. Hah! I suspect it was not so much the garden that he loved, but rather the sea that he hated!

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The Irrelevance of Global Warming

Why are we still having a debate over global warming? Most of the world’s scientists agree that it’s happening. Geological data tell us that it is normal for the climate to change, so it is certainly possible that it is changing right now. And it is possible that we’re contributing to that change by altering our atmosphere.

If you don’t believe we’re altering the atmosphere, just try running your car in an enclosed space. What? You don’t want to do that? Because it would kill you? Yeah, it would. And all that deadly gas spewing from your car’s tailpipe is going into the atmosphere, along with the emissions from billions of other cars, power plants, furnaces, fireplaces, and God-knows-what-else.

But I’m going to cut you a deal, naysayers. Let’s just ignore this whole global warming thing. It is, in a way, irrelevant. The real problem is pollution. We all agree that we’re polluting the earth, right? So let’s try to stop that. In the process, we’ll limit our emission of greenhouse gases, cutting back on that which would contribute to global warming (if it did actually exist), but we’re only going to worry about keeping our earth clean. Deal?

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Letting Go

Dear Kids,

I spent a lot of time yesterday sorting your clothes and retiring the outfits that no longer fit you. From those first tiny newborn onesies, to footie pajamas, to bulky winter jackets, every piece of your clothing has had special meaning for me. Retiring them means saying good-bye to you as you just were, accepting that you’re growing up and slowly, ever so slowly, separating yourselves from me. It’s like pulling off a Band-Aid a little bit at a time. It hurts more that way, but no matter how tough it gets, I’ll never wish it to go faster.

Take your time. Enjoy every second of your childhood. I know I will.

Love,

Mom

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Criminals and Crazies

There have been a lot of news articles lately about psychopaths and the test that can supposedly sort the psychopaths from the garden-variety criminals. So here’s a related Poirot quote. He once said,

It is an interesting subject of after-dinner conversation—are all criminals really madmen? There may be a malformation in their little grey cells—yes, it is very likely. That, it is the affair of the doctor. For me—I have different work to perform. I have the innocent to think of, not the guilty—the victim, not the criminal.

from Peril at End House

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Two Library Books

Twilight by Stephenie Meyer
Grade: C-

This book, its sequels, and the movies are so famous, and the story so simple, that I’m not going to worry about spoilers. If you’re concerned about them, then you might not want to read the rest of this post, but honestly, I don’t think I could ruin much for you.

Here’s the story: a girl named Bella Swan moves to a town where there’s little sunshine, falls in love with a vampire named Edward, and then is almost killed by a rival vampire. That’s it. There’s no real complexity, no character development, not even any real suspense.

I get it, though. I understand why this book appeals to teenage girls. That doesn’t change the fact that it’s tripe. No amount of understanding teenage girls can make up for the fact that the writing is bad and the story stinks.

Why do teenage girls like it so much? Because every girl wants to be the be-all-end-all for a guy, and Edward is totally fascinated, obsessed even, with Bella. He wants to know every single detail about her. He sneaks into her bedroom at night to watch her sleeping. He gets jealous over her. He’s dangerous. And he can never have sex with her because he might lose control and eat her, so her virginity is safe.

If you ever watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV series), then this story must sound familiar. But oh, the difference! The Buffy/Angel relationship is complex. Their characters develop. They have moments. Angel, the tortured soul, is both attractive and frightening.

Edward, on the other hand, is so frickin perfect as to be irritating. He is beyond good-looking, dresses impeccably, drives a nice car, has a caring family, seems to know everything and even reads minds, plays the piano and composes, runs at lightning speed, is almost impossible to kill, and he sparkles in the sunlight. Yeah, Meyer’s vampires sparkle. That’s why they don’t go out on bright days. Ugh.

Actually, I became interested in reading this book because one of my old high-school friends is involved with a movie currently being made called Vampires Don’t Sparkle. I figured the title was a reference to Twilight. I couldn’t believe that anyone would want to create sparkling vampires, but I had to know. Sometimes knowledge hurts.

The prose hurts, too. I almost put the book down after the first page. It was that bad. Curiosity somehow kept me going, and I found many horrible sentences, paragraphs, even pages, but let me share with you my favorite quote. In this quote, Edward is speaking. He is angry with Bella because she doesn’t seem to care that her life is in jeopardy.

“So you’re worried about the trouble it might cause me—if you don’t come home?” His voice was still angry, and bitingly sarcastic.

Yeah, the author used the word “bitingly” in a book about vampires. And it’s not supposed to be funny. But it is, isn’t it?

I could go on for pages and pages, picking this novel apart, and loving every minute of it, but I don’t have time, so I’m going to wrap this up now.

I think Twilight is barely readable. Though I understand why some teenage girls like it, I wouldn’t recommend it for any girl of any age. You see, when you grow up, you realize that obsessive boys are dangerous. They’re the ones that become wife beaters. Girls should learn to steer away from those guys, not deliberately seek them out. Bella’s stupidity ought to have gotten her killed. The author spared Bella’s life, but Real Life isn’t always so kind. In other words, I don’t think it’s healthy reading.

I am slightly curious about how the series ends, but there’s no way I’m going to read any more of this junk. If I decide that I must know what happens, I’ll just read a plot synopsis, or maybe watch the movies.

The Giver by Lois Lowry
Grade: A-

Jonas lives in a world in which all of society’s problems seem to have been solved. There is no hunger and no violence. But then Jonas is selected for a special job, and as he begins to fill his new role, he learns more about his community. He discovers that things aren’t as perfect as they appear.

The difference between The Giver and Twilight is like the difference between day and night. But though The Giver is by far the better book, it also disappointed me, just in a different way. Twilight is awful but easy to understand. The Giver is very well written, but its ending is unclear. The final scene is so weird that I’m still not sure what happened. I don’t like books that end that way. I think a vague ending is usually a cheap out for the author. They can’t think of a good resolution, so they deliberately leave the ending open to interpretation. Or perhaps they think such an ending will add “depth” to the story, because the reader will have to ponder it. Either way, I don’t like it.

But excepting the final scene, The Giver is both interesting and thought-provoking. That’s why I still gave it a good grade. I read this book because it was on the list of Top 100 Children’s Books, and I agree that it belongs on the list. I recommend it for adults who liked The Handmaid’s Tale, 1984, Brave New World, Soylent Green, and other similar stories. I also recommend it specifically for teenagers, as they are clearly the target audience and it is appropriate reading for that age group.

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