A Thought

I would never say that true stories aren’t good, but I think the made-up ones are usually better.

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Occupational Hazard

Being a detective is not always the nicest job, really, so it should come as no surprise that most detectives are a mite peculiar, having witnessed human nature too many times at its worst. Our favorite fictional detective, Hercule Poirot, is a strange little man. Here, perhaps, is why:

Mon ami,” said Poirot, “I like to inquire into everything. Hercule Poirot is a good dog. The dog follows the scent, and if, regrettably, there is no scent to follow, he noses around—seeking always something that is not very nice. So also, does Hercule Poirot. And often—oh! so often—does he find it!”

from Peril at End House

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My Moment

In Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, Amy said,

PURPLE FLOWER

There is a single purple flower a couple of feet from where I am sitting. I am feeling poorly dressed and missing my long hair. I am at Café De Lucca in Bucktown, and there is a purple flower—that’s how I would define this moment. And you, your moment? Where are you at this moment? E-mail me and tell me. If you are the hundredth person to do so, I will bake you a pie and FedEx it to you. You will have to trust me on this.

I remember thinking to myself, “Wow. I can’t believe Amy is going to make me write to her and tell her that I’m sitting on the pot as I read this. That is my moment—reading on the pot.” In fact, I read most of her book in the bathroom. With two kids and a full-time job, my bathroom time is often the only chance I get to read. And if I should occasionally stay in there a little longer than is strictly necessary, who’s to say?

While my current lack of reading time might tempt me to linger in the john, I was a bathroom reader even when I had all the time in the world. It’s a family habit. Like my mother before me, I cannot tolerate being in the bathroom with nothing to read. If there are no books, magazines, or catalogs, I’ll read the label from the deodorant, the shampoo, whatever’s handy. My mom and I had a good laugh when we discovered that we both do that.

After I moved out on my own, I must have read the toothpaste tube dozens of times before I learned to properly stock the bathroom with reading material. Now there’s always something in there, if only an old issue of Smithsonian that I’ve already read from front to back, its pages wavy from the steam of dozens of hot showers, but at least it’s good-quality, educational reading with no inactive ingredients.

Anyway, I thought “my moment” was sort of funny. I wanted to tell it to someone. I even went to Amy’s web site with the intention of sharing it, but when I saw how many people had responded to that same paragraph, how popular the book had become, my story no longer felt fresh, but rather stale and wrinkled, like it had been sitting in the bathroom too long.

Oh well. I’ll share it with you instead. You don’t mind stale and wrinkled, do you? Feel free to print it out and read it in the bathroom. That is, after all, a great place to read.

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Amy’s Interesting Book

Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life by Amy Krouse Rosenthal
Grade: A

On the cover of Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life are some words from the foreword that sum up the book: “I have no survived against all odds. I have not lived to tell. I have not witnessed the extraordinary. This is my story.”

What an intriguing concept! How could anyone ordinary write a whole book about themselves? What would they have to say? And what chutzpah to think anyone else could ever find it interesting!

But it is interesting. The author, who I think of as Amy (justified, I think, given the personal nature of the book), took a bunch of her memories and observations, gave each an explanatory title, then alphabetized them. Sometimes she included little bits of artwork or tables that break up the text nicely and make the whole thing look more like a real encyclopedia.

This is a love it or hate it book, or so it seems browsing through the online reviews. The people who hate it just don’t seem to get the point, and they say, “Yeah, Amy. You didn’t survive against all odds, or live to tell, and that’s why you shouldn’t have written a book about yourself!” But I think everyone has interesting thoughts, at least once in a while. OK, I admit that I found small sections of it dull, but the beauty of this book’s format is that you can easily skip to the next entry to see if it’s more to your liking, and there’s plenty to like.

To give you an example, here’s what Amy says about doing things.

DOING SOMETHING

It is so much easier to not do something than to do something. Even the smallest task, like filling out a Scholastic Books order form or putting away the butter, requires time, focus, and follow-through. It’s astounding, actually, that anything gets done at all, by anyone.

Yet. Still. Somehow. I am encouraged to see that despite the colossal effort, despite the odds against one, despite the mere constraints of time and schedules and sore throats, houses do get built, pottery gets glazed, e-mails get sent, trees get planted, shoes get reheeled, manifestos get Xeroxed, films get shot, highways get repaved, cakes get frosted, stories get told.

I’m a lifelong procrastinator, so I get what she’s saying here. Doing something, anything, always feels like a pain in the butt. The fact that I get anything done (like this blog post) is truly amazing. I’ve always wondered, actually, why no one else seems to think that doing things is such a chore. Now I know at least one other person out there also realizes the effort required to do the simplest things.

I liked Amy’s encyclopedia. I recommend it. I also heartily encourage others to follow her lead. Write down the stories of your life!

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Tooth Delay

Dear Livia,

You have been behaving as though teething for well over a month, and it just keeps getting worse. Your mouth is a waterfall of drool. Your crankiness has escalated over the last few days, to the point that you are sometimes nearly inconsolable. The other night, you woke up every hour or so to howl for a while, before slipping back into a restless sleep. But still no teeth. Would you please hurry up and cut those teeth, Sweetie?

Love,

Mom

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Neat Eater

As my husband can attest, I’m not a neat eater. I don’t know why, but I just can’t seem to keep food off my clothes. Ah, well. At least I don’t have a mustache to worry about, unlike our favorite fictional detective.

Hercule Poirot addressed himself to the task of keeping his moustaches out of the soup.

from Murder on the Orient Express

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Following Tradition

I went to the annual Westerly Book Fair last week. It’s a tradition now, so I had to go. I wasn’t nine months pregnant and just about to give birth, so this year’s sale certainly lacked the ooomph of 2009’s. The selection wasn’t that much better than 2010’s sale (a rather lackluster affair), but the sale was held at the library this year, rather than the YMCA, making it seem a little better.

Here’s what I bought.

  1. Rilla of Ingleside by L.M. Montgomery: For some reason, I thought this was a rare book that I simply had to own, but it’s just the last in the Anne of Green Gables series and not particularly hard to find. Well, it could still be good. You just never know.
  2. The White Deer by James Thurber: Though I already own a copy of this book, I’ve never read it. This new copy is a first edition!
  3. Bed-knob and Broomstick by Mary Norton: I couldn’t remember if I owned a copy, so I bought this one. As it turns out, I do already have one, but it’s softcover. This hardback may prove to be better.
  4. Because of Winn-Dixie by Kate DiCamillo: This is on the top 100 children’s book list, so I’ve been meaning to read it. Now I’ve got a copy handy, so no excuses!
  5. The Magician’s Elephant by Kate DiCamillo: Why not? She’s a proven author (see #4), so it’s probably decent.
  6. The Dark is Rising by Susan Cooper: Another from the top 100 list (see #4).
  7. Crosbie’s Dictionary of Riddles by John S. Crosbie: Yay! A riddle book!
  8. The Little Riddle Book: Yet more riddles! Yay more!
  9. Anna and the King of Siam by Margaret Landon : I figured (rightly) that this was the book that The King and I was based on. I thought it might be a fun read.
  10. Eek! There’s a Mouse in the House by Wong Herbert Yee: This one was for Marshall. The title was fitting given the recent invasion of mice in our house. (Thank God for Peeps, our huntress supreme!)
  11. Toes are to Tickle by Shen Roddie: This is a cute book for kids. I do wish, though, that it didn’t reinforce the idea that chairs are for climbing. (They’re really not, Marshall. They’re for sitting.)
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Bouncy Ball

Marshall’s auntie bought him a shiny, new, bouncy ball. We all like it. Why? Because…

“We are all children at heart,” said Poirot thoughtfully. “Les Feux d’Artifices, the Party, the games with balls—yes, and even the conjuror, the man who deceives the eye, however carefully it watches…”

from Peril at End House

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Power Savers

All of us should try to limit our energy usage. Here are some of the things that my husband and I have done to save energy.

  • We added insulation to the attic. We can no longer use the space for storage, but the insulation helps keep the house toasty warm, not to mention that we don’t get ice dams anymore.
  • We replaced all of our windows and external doors. It cost us a bundle, but I shudder to think what our heating bills would be like if we hadn’t done it.
  • We replaced our shower head. The new, efficient shower head works great. It was a totally painless way to conserve energy.
  • We keep our thermostat set to the low 60s during the winter. It seemed cold at first, but I’ve gotten used to warming myself by wearing sweaters and fleecies. Now, when I go shopping during the winter, I almost can’t stand being in the store because it’s so dry and hot!
  • We try to remember to turn off any lights we’re not using. It’s such a habit for us that our son, barely two years old, has already learned it. He knows to turn the light off when he leaves a room!
  • We try to open windows and run fans instead of running the AC.
  • We often use the energy saving feature on our AC, even though it’s extremely noisy.
  • We use the coolest water temperature appropriate for each load of laundry.
  • We’re trying to eat less meat and to buy more locally grown foods. We even joined a CSA last year!
  • I buy all my music by digital download. My husband has warned me that I may regret this someday, since the quality of the MP3 files that they sell is not as good as the files we would create by ripping the CDs ourselves. Oh, well. I just don’t want to be responsible for more plastic being created unnecessarily.
  • We try to buy minimally processed foods. It often seems that the more processed a food is, the more packaging that comes with it. More packaging means more energy usage and more waste.

It almost sounds impressive, like we’re being really “green,” but we didn’t do any of it to save the environment per se. We did it to save money or, in some cases, to improve our diet (being healthy saves money, too!). It was totally selfishly motivated, and yet so good for everyone.

There are still more ways in which we can selfishly save energy. My personal goals include

  • Taking shorter showers
  • Using fewer paper towels
  • Eventually, building raised beds and growing some veggies
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Rant Against Riders

As I mentioned before, there are people who ride ATVs and dirt bikes in the woods behind my house. I hate that. At the risk of sounding prudish, old-fashioned, sissy, or like a tree-hugger, I am strongly against riding fuel-burning vehicles in the woods for several reasons.

What is the purpose of having woods? I mean, why do we leave the land wooded instead of chopping it all down and developing it in some way? Different people might have slightly different answers, but I believe all of those answers boil down to the same basic idea: we realize on some level that we must have areas where Nature can live on her own terms. A balance is created by and between the flora and fauna. This balance is critical to life on this planet as we know it, if for no other reason than plants are our air scrubbers. Without them, there will be too much carbon dioxide and too little oxygen for us to survive.

There is also a psychological, emotional, and spiritual value to the woods. Most people, I think, feel better when they spend time in a natural setting, such as in the woods, or at a park, or near a lake. In my experience, walking in the woods is a great way to relax, get some exercise, and breathe some fresh air.

We need wooded areas. This we know. But just “having” them isn’t enough. We need to preserve them. Mostly, though, we end up harming them. In some places, we prevent all forest fires. Without the natural cleaning that occasional, small fires provide, the forest floor becomes a tinderbox and just the merest spark can ignite an unstoppable inferno. In other places, like the rain forest, we cut down too many trees, which creates a number of problems, including erosion of the land and extinction of certain animals. We have also introduced certain plants and animals into places where they have no natural enemies, allowing them to overwhelm the native flora and fauna. Here we dread our first sighting of the Asian longhorned beetle, because we know it is probably just a matter of time.

Those are just a few of the big ways that we damage our forests. There are also smaller ways. For example, we cut trails. I’m no expert, but it seems to me that trails ruin the natural drainage of the forest. Water follows the path of least resistance, so it rushes down trails much harder and faster than it does elsewhere. The longer this goes on, the more the trail degrades. Eventually, the people who use the woods will create new trails because the old ones are rutted and full of loose rock. Ultimately, that doesn’t help. In places where there is forest management, rangers will set up and maintain berms and drainage areas. There is no one to do that in our woods, and the ATV riders are constantly making new trails.

So I get really mad at the people who ride their motorized vehicles in the woods. First, they make noise which spoils the quiet, natural aura of the woods. Second, they make pollution which spoils the fresh air. And last but not least, they’re always making new trails, sometimes just feet away from the old ones. This kills plants and causes erosion.

Get out of the woods, riders!

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