I must be living in the Monty Python scene where they bring out the dead and one of them says, “But I’m not dead yet!”
That’s me. I’m still not dead. In spite of all my efforts to be dead, the catalog company continues to send me catalogs.
Do they think I’m going to dial in from the Beyond and say, “I really fancy that Claddagh ring. Could you ship it to Heaven c/o God?”
Our new mattress, formerly known as The Cloud, had me floating on air for about two weeks, and then it started to sink and I started to ache. Faithful Reader, who noticed the sagging before I did, agreed that there was a problem. Since then, we have been shopping for a replacement.
Buying a mattress is like buying a car. Continue reading
Life is too short.
The last two books I read in 2007 were from the children’s section of my library.
Whispering to Witches by Anna Dale
Grade: B
Whispering to Witches is a story about an everyday boy who gets caught up in a witch mystery. In the inevitable comparison with Harry Potter, this book loses because it doesn’t have the same depth, but it is nevertheless fun and I would recommend it for children.
The Sisters Grimm, Book One: Fairy-Tale Detectives by Michael Buckley
Grade: B
Fairy-Tale Detectives is the first book in a series. It is about two descendants of the Brothers Grimm, young sisters named Daphne and Sabrina. Their parents have disappeared and after running away from several foster homes, the girls are finally placed with a woman who claims to be their grandmother. When the old lady is abducted by a giant, the sisters learn that some fairy-tales are true, and they set out to rescue the one woman who can explain it all.
I never became so immersed that I forgot that I was reading, so I “heard” rather than “saw” the story of Fairy-Tale Detectives. It is probably a good adventure for youngsters, but I would not recommend it for adults.
That’s two more books that will be heading out into the world to find new homes, and thank goodness, because Christmas brought many new books to our house!
I always thought that if you waited too long to pee, you’d simply wet your pants and that was it. I was wrong. Bladders can actually rupture if overfilled and left overfull for long periods of time.
So, my friends, love your bladders and treat them right. This New Year’s Eve, if you drink alcohol, pee often and don’t drink enough to pass out. Not only is passing out extremely dangerous for a variety of other reasons, but while you’re unconscious your bladder could go POP! And that’s icky.
A love of reading doesn’t necessarily translate into a talent for picking literature apart and I sometimes wonder how I survived three years as an English major. I was reasonably good at it (they gave me a degree, anyway), but after graduating I gave up my pretensions and went back to reading solely for the love of it. That’s why I call my reading page “Book Love.”
I love books so much that in 2007 I read and graded 44 of them. Continue reading
What better time to get back into the habit of being grateful than after receiving so many great gifts?
This year the Borg assimilated our Christmas tree and decked it with energy-efficient lights. Soon the tree will join “The Collective,” so let us admire its biological and technological distinctiveness one last time before it goes.
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
Your lights are so cyborgy.
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
Your lights are so cyborgy.
Your assimilation was a breeze
And you look so cool in LEDs.
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
Your lights are so cyborgy.
It’s Christmas Eve already. Who knew time could move so fast?
Merry Christmas!
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